Day 15 – Working Harder

This is the last week. I must work harder because the results does not meet my expectations. I have had this stupid headache which (it’s my opinion) induced weakness Thursday and Friday. Those are many precious PT hours where I could have done much better.

Awaking was a bit hard; fatigue I think after fresh air, sun and travel by van/bus. The rash that started yesterday is getting really itchy! I don’t know what started it but MAN! I’d love to have 10 arms and hands to scratch myself…

My IVs fix dealers are here earlier this morning. No wonder; Doctor have to pass by. Actually DoctorS… Three of them; Doctor He and Dr Doctor and her collegue. I will try to get them in pictures and identify them. I have always been bad with names and faces; then they hit me with Chinese; hopeless…

Previous days have been discussed and I made them aware of my feelings. They do not seem to think the same way. They probably want to sell me few more weeks but this is not in my short to middle – term plans.

My plan is drawn since day 1. My last week backup plan is to double the efforts at physical exercise; get botox injected in the ligaments to soften them; Pain killers to let them force on the knees and other ‘jammed’ joints and 200mg of testosterone (20mg Heroine would certainly do too but I doubt they deal it openly, I am not rich enough). Hormones will give me the extra energy I feel I miss during exercising.

They ~really~ don’t seem to like it…It is a bit invasive; it might be painful; it is not in any protocol; we never did that, etc I think I heard that bell’s tone somewhere before… I am at a loss when I see hesitation. I must be at a such desperate level or somehow out of my mind. For my side of the story; I would say I am the free guinea pig (We even pay for it) and it makes sense when you waste most time trying to educate yourself throughout all available means. They probably are scared to slip out of their guidelines; afraid that would somehow influence the flow which they know best… I have no idea and answers to the questions like  “Why wouldn’t you do it?” remain evasive at best; ignored mostly. “We cannot make a blood draw right now because we do not know if the Stem Cells IV are modifying any of the basic values; as we did not panel the needed analyses when you arrive. (sic)”. It really looks like they try to drown the fish, for me, but again; who am I to contradict that. It just seems odd to me that they would not know if their proceeding does influence ‘any’ particle of my body but hey! “Everyone’s different” Hahahaha sure; can’t argue on that.

A dermatologist followed shortly seeing my rashe and decreeting it was the hot day and sweat allergy, nothing serious and gave me cream. At least it itches less, let’s see how it evolves…

I really gave my whole in the PT sessions and even acupuncture was restful this time. The William Tell of Chinese Medecine even introduced few points to me; along with needles-proof.  Four needles in the frontal bone of the skull, more painful this time. Don’t laugh; true: when I bite it feel pain in the middle of the head with those needles, and if I swallow. But well; even getting better ooks like crossing the path of pain.

Nothing compared to my knees anyway. Second session of PT was also intense and I swatted profusely; I was still breathless when back in the room.

I had a good and “oh wow” refreshing shower. Since I cant help much myself in the shower; the caregiver does assist and I was clean head to toes… Felt good.
AND hungry! Damn! I need to eat… Good disease, use to say my Mother when I was a kid. We had ‘doggy bags’ from Sunday and I ate all that was left as beef, beans with chili, spinaches and garlic along with a kind of steam thin pancake you get almost anywhere in Asia.  Thanks Heavens and all the other good beings of this universe, I’ll die with a full belly 😛

Early to bed; but strangely difficult to fall asleep despite the Stilnox sleeping pill… I browsed FB and internet until… Rrrr zzzzz….

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